Trying to sit down and write or type any of my stories has become somewhat, unappealing to me.
I hate saying that, because of my childhood dream about becoming a writer.
I guess life is trying to take it's toll on me, or maybe it's my mind trying to hurt itself before anything can happen.
To me, life is written in chapters, depending on what is going on. School wasn't a factor in my chapters, where I was, who I was with, and the way I thought at the time determined each chapter. But I look back at the memories from each chapter and at times I'm full of emotion, feelings of longing and at times regret.
But I guess everyone feels this from time to time. Can't change the past but it can still affect your future.
The real reason for my writer's block is how drastic my life changed after high school. Getting a job, moving out, getting engaged, the list goes on. So much new responsibility, but all with the knowledge of what will happen in the future.
It's pessimistic, it's a times morbid, but I know that all I have will come to an end. My life, those I love, those I have yet to meet. I'm terrified when it all will end, and if I am ready for any of it.
These sad thoughts drive the creativity from my mind, darken my mood and attempts to alienate me form others.
I hope this changes, as I understand this is a phase I will eventually get past. I hope my writing stops suffering and I can get on with my stories.
I'm going to start using my twitter more often to so I will keep everyone updated as my stories are coming along.
That about wraps this up, I apologize for the depressing mood, just wanted to get that off my mind a bit.
The next time I post it will be a more positive update of the next chapter or a new story entirely.
Till next time,
Roger
